Pro-Antisocial Media

I predict a new trend will soon sweep the internet: antisocial media.

You read that right. It's not that I'm anti-social media. Indeed, I am pro-antisocial media. And I fully believe there is room on the Web for both.

I'm not quite advocating a regression to the days of old, to the time when you could click on a website and not be pressured by a dozen buttons to Like, Digg, Retweet, Reddit, Mash or Stumbl the particular article. If you still want to do that, great.

But what if you want to remain willfully self-contained, with your privacy intact and the fact that you actually clicked on "One Weird Old-Timey Trick to Lose Belly Fat" unknown to each of your Facebook friends?

What I would suggest is a separate domain of "mirror" sites that look just like the originals, only without all the social features. Can you imagine a New York Times article without the tacky sidebar of sharing options? To their credit, they urge you "Recommend" instead of the boorish, monosyllabic "Like."

(Also: Can you imagine a New York Times article that you don't have to pay for? Through social media, you can jump the paywall! But I digress...)

My personal method of spreading content is admittedly officious:

1. A specific person or group of people has to come to mind when I read an article -- usually one that requires a triple-digit IQ to comprehend. (If you're reading this, you probably qualify.)
2. To make sure it only reaches the desired audience, I lovingly copy the URL and paste it into an email or private Facebook message. This move says, Hey, I thought you'd enjoy this -- and I don't want Facebook stalkers to know what we discuss when they aren't around.
3. If the article/video is so low-brow that I feel it can be appreciated by most of my friends, I'll post it as a link on Facebook. This ensures I get credit for having found it, read/watched it, and deemed it worthy of sharing.

Cherry-picking individuals when I could easily click one button and send it to nearly 800 people? My friends, there's nothing more antisocial than that.

How many people even remember the keyboard shortcuts for copy and paste? Most people's left pinky and forefinger have atrophied, because the one-click-fits-all mentality of social media has led them not to even consider who they're being "social" with.

By treating media as antisocial, I've immeasurably raised my appreciation for the social interactions I do have. It can't be long until other great minds understand this concept and ditch the Tweetcaster app from their iPad home screen. Instead, they'll return to paying a few quarters for a paper copy of the Wall Street Journal that they'll then leave behind to enrich another lucky soul.

And you can stop sharing Washington Post stories about Libya to make yourself look engaged. It's OK if you spend more time looking for shirtless pics of Robert Pattinson. With antisocial media, it's just easier to keep it to yourself.